On the 18th April 2011 Hector Stringer took his own life. Hector, the beloved son and brother was colourful light in the world and he led a life filled with friends, music and gigs often playing in pub and also spending many hours playing music in the green hed at the bottom of their garden. But like a lot of teenagers, he had struggles…struggles he, for whatever reason ever spoke about with his family and friends. In the year before his death his family found him to be self-harming, they were reassured that this wasn’t unusual and were swift to seek help from counselling. Counselling seemed to help and he appeared to be better, at least temporarily. But sadly the reality is…we never really know what goes on in another person’s mind and often it can be an accumulation of seemingly insignificant events that lead you to place where the pain is too much.
Hector was found by his mother and sister Lotte. The family’s world would never be the same again and finding a way to deal with a world without their beautiful son and brother would be their daily challenge they would be forced to endure. As Hector was much loved by many and the family were quick to realise that they needed to give their strength to others. Lotte gave access to the shed where he’d spent so much of his time and left marker pens for his friends so they could leave messages of tribute on the walls as a way to express their loss. The shed would later develop significance as a symbol of support and understanding as it is now the logo for their charity Hector’s House.
The family have continued to this day to tell their story to raise awareness of mental health and through the Hector’s House charity offer a beacon of support to those in need. Everyone should have someone to turn to when life is painful and Hector’s House provide just that.
What his family say about Hector:
Nothing can prepare you for the unbelievable pain and grief you feel after losing a loved one in such tragic circumstances. The ‘what if’s’ and the ‘if onlys’ that we live with every day can at times feel overwhelming. If only we had known how he was feeling…?
Hector lived life loudly. He had a beautiful soul, and as cliché as it sounds, his smile genuinely would light up the room as soon as he entered it. He was full of energy, with a personality that people were drawn to. The twinkle in his eyes always made him look like he was up to mischief – he probably was, but he was just having fun! You couldn’t be mad at Hec for long, his laugh was infectious, and he’d soon give you a massive bear hug.
He surrounded himself with a wonderful circle of friends. He would do anything for them and they would for him. Hector would go out of the way to make everyone feel special, his kindness and open heart came second nature to him.
Hector’s love for music was all consuming, he was talented musician and performer. He played guitar and sang. He was in a band and they would often perform in pubs and gigs – he loved it. Hector would spend hours in the shed at the bottom of the garden practising or listening to songs that inspired him.
His crazy sense of humour means everyone that knew him has unique memories that will forever be cherished.
The world has less colour now Hector has gone.
Call Hector’s House on 07397 155562